Our nervous system is constantly scanning for safety, connection, and danger. When it feels overwhelmed — emotionally, mentally, or physically — it can shift outside the Window of Tolerance, landing in either hyperarousal or hypoarousal. These states are natural, human responses, but when we don’t understand them, they can feel scary, confusing, or shame-inducing.

Learning to recognize these states — and knowing how to regulate them — is a powerful act of self-awareness and self-care.

What Is Hyperarousal?

Hyperarousal is the fight/flight side of the nervous system.
It happens when the body senses danger and prepares to protect you.

Signs You May Be in Hyperarousal:

Racing thoughts
Feeling panicked, anxious, or overwhelmed
Difficulty focusing
Restlessness or fidgeting
Irritability or anger
Rapid heartbeat or fast breathing
Feeling “on edge” or easily startled

Hyperarousal often shows up when we’re stressed, overstimulated, or triggered by something that feels unsafe — even if it’s emotional, not physical.

What Is Hypoarousal?

Hypoarousal is the freeze/shutdown state.
It’s the body saying: “This is too much. I need to shut down to protect you.”

Signs You May Be in Hypoarousal:

Numbness or feeling disconnected
Low energy or exhaustion
Feeling spacey, foggy, or dissociated
Difficulty speaking or thinking clearly
Emotional emptiness
Feeling “far away” or “not in your body”
Wanting to withdraw, sleep, or disappear

Hypoarousal often happens when overwhelm becomes too intense, and the nervous system flips the breaker to survive.

How to Notice What State You’re In

Pay attention to:

Your body: tight vs. heavy? jittery vs. numb?
Your breath: fast vs. shallow vs. barely there
Your energy level: wired vs. wiped out
Your thoughts: racing vs. foggy
Your behavior: overdoing vs. withdrawing

Naming it — “I’m in hyperarousal” or “I think I’m shutting down” — already begins the process of regulation.

How to Support Yourself in Hyperarousal

When you’re activated, your body needs slowing, grounding, and safety cues.

1. Slow and steady breathing

Try: Inhale 4, exhale 6.
Longer exhales help signal safety.

2. Ground your body

Feel your feet on the floor
Sit against a wall or the couch
Hold something heavy (a mug, a weighted blanket, a pillow)

3. Orient to the room

Look around and name:

5 things you see
3 things you hear
1 thing you feel

This pulls the brain out of threat mode.

4. Use warm temperature

Warmth signals safety.
Warm tea, a heating pad, warm hands on your chest.

5. Co-regulate

If available, sit with someone safe or listen to a warm, steady voice.

How to Support Yourself in Hypoarousal

When you’re shut down, your body needs gentle activation, not calming.

1. Small movements first

Wiggle your toes
Roll your shoulders
Slowly sit up or stand

2. Stimulating temperature

Splash cool water on your face
Hold an ice cube or cold can
Step outside for fresh air

3. Short, energizing breaths

2 quick sniffs in, long exhale out.
Repeat 5–10 times.

4. Engage your senses

Peppermint or citrus scent
Upbeat or rhythmic music
Textured objects (fuzzy, rough, cold)

5. Connect with a safe person or pet

Even a brief interaction can help pull you back online.

You Deserve to Feel Steady and Safe

Understanding your nervous system helps you meet yourself with compassion rather than judgment. Hyperarousal and hypoarousal are not failures — they are protective responses your body learned to survive.

With awareness, gentleness, and practice, you can help bring yourself back into your Window of Tolerance and feel more grounded, present, and connected.